Of course, when I said that we have lots to do and so little time, I forgot that Amelie would be waking me up at the crack of dawn, and giving me an extra two working hours I wasn't expecting. I had the washing up done before the sun had made it over the horizon.

This time two years ago, I was getting ready to snog a woman outside the Town Hall...

... whilst appreciating the Bible's advice not to have sex before marriage...

Amelie did boost the cute quotient of the photos though. And lower the average age of the guests. There are only so many pensioners you can invite.

On that subject, the grey brigade will be arriving in a few hours, so I need to text them and remind them to bring presents. Preferably anniversary ones. I'm currently allowing Lisa to sleep late as a token of my love, which is a problem as I haven't written her card yet, and I've just realised that I've left it in the cupboard at the side of the bed. I bought it a couple of weeks ago, but decided not to write it ahead of time, in case we had a major argument and I went off her. I didn't want to waste a good spell book.

As it happens though, I still love her as much today as I did a hundred months ago. More, actually, as I barely knew her back then, and she turned out to be even better than I expected. Not only is she the perfect wife, but she couldn't be a better mother. As I said to her last week, even if I divorce her and end up hating her guts, I'd still employ her to look after my kids. She's that good.

I'm planning to hold my parents hostage later, and force them to look after Toby and Amelie so that I can take Lisa out for a meal. We don't have much money, but I've been saving up my Tesco Clubcard vouchers in the name of true romance, so she can order anything she likes. Up to a certain value. In the meantime, I'm reliving our wedding day by browsing all our photos. Marrying Lisa was the best thing I ever did, and I love her to absolute bits.