During today's fine edition of Richard & Judy, I witnessed for the first time an advert for new Walls Balls - spheres of sausagemeat in breadcrumbs, aimed squarely at the children's market. Can there be any more cynical marketing ploy than to name your product after a mildly rude word, safe in the knowledge that children all over Britain will eat them, merely so that when Mother asks what they want for tea, they can shout back "BALLS!!!"?

I'm off now to buy a packet of Bernard Matthews 'Up Yours'.