Subscribe: Subscribe to me on YouTube

Saturday, January 04, 2014

I'm not saying my children are camp, but...

It's as though Rylan Clark is taking Duncan Norvelle for a walk. And if the bloke in the background was willing to black up, I'd have a pretty good photo of N-Dubz.

Anyhoo, the good news is that Lisa and I felt a lot better this morning. The bad news is that I felt a lot worse this afternoon. But by that time, Lisa had long since departed for her drafty weekend in a Brighton hotel, leaving me to fend for myself with the kids. So I've spent the day proving that parenting is a piece of cake by eating lots of yule log, and throwing up more than just my hands in despair.

Fortunately, I've fed the kids a bit more healthily. In fact, if you think you can't face breakfast first thing in the morning, try this...

That's what I served up to Amelie this morning. I was going to add Marmite, but I didn't want it looking racist.

Lisa left at 10am with the look of a woman who couldn't wait to get away from the kids, so having got them both dressed (that only took about half an hour) I decided to head down to the marina to see who could get swept out to sea first.

When I said I'd got them both dressed, I didn't say I'd dressed them sensibly. But as hats go, those aren't as embarrassing as the double-bobble number that Lisa's just bought for herself.

Anyhoo, the difference between my parenting philosophy and Lisa's is that I paid for Toby's shoes, so I'm bloody well going to make him walk in them. I refused to take the buggy for purely financial reasons, and it proved to be a good decision. By the time we got home, I felt I'd got my money's worth out of that footwear...

Amelie was so good with him that I see no reason why I can't let them go out on their own. I just need to teach her how to tell the time so that she'll be back before bedtime.

We spent an hour wandering around the marina until the gale force winds and pouring rain forced us into Asda for a new duvet, and ultimately back home for lunch. It was at that point that I took a turn for the worse, and went down with more sickness and a splitting headache, but Amelie was quite understanding and only forced me to play SpongeBob on the PS2 for about two hours straight. Somehow I managed to change the bedding and do the washing, whilst retrieving a pebble from Toby's mouth, and by the time Lisa returned at 5:30pm, I'd managed to keep both the kids and myself alive.

And if there's one thing which makes it all worthwhile - aside from the M&S cheesecake Lisa brought home with her - it's this handwritten note from Amelie...

It says 'You are my best Dad'. Obviously the competition's not that fierce, and I had to pay her to write it, but it's touching nonetheless.


Phil's Mum said...

Amelie did tell me the other day that she felt she could look after Toby while you and Lisa go out. By the time we'd worked out how old he would be when that is legal, I think she'd lost interest. But she was doing a good job there. Sorry the expedition made you ill, but your children seemed to be thoroughly enjoying it.