Obviously when it comes to Amelie's wardrobe, I like to spare no expense. That girl's dressed in some of the finest clothes money can buy...

...for under two quid from a charity shop. If I feel like splashing out on something more expensive, I'll occasionally go to Primark, but as a general rule it's hospice shops all the way.

So whilst in Uckfield this week, I generously donated £1.65 to the dying of East Sussex in return for another purple dress. It's a bit like the one pictured on Wednesday, but without the vomit stains and revealing hemline. Lisa dressed her in it today, so when I got home from work this afternoon I decided to film Amelie modelling her expensive new outfit.

She was staggering across the living room at the time with my work bag around her neck and a buggy in both hands, trying to take her baby for a walk around the sofa. At which point she revealed a remarkable new talent...


With a bit of horror movie voiceover work under her belt, we'll soon be waving goodbye to Primark and buying her clothes from Asda.

Talking of which, I need to go shopping. Home-cooked Mother's Day meals don't just make themselves, you know. Unless you buy them frozen from a supermarket. I need to get down there before they sell out of ready meals.