We had a menu delivered through the front door yesterday from 'China Town 2', a quality establishment in Upper Lewes Road which offers "Fish & Chips and Oriental Cuisine to Take Away". I've never been there myself, mainly because I tend to be disappointed by sequels, but I was intrigued by the statement on the back of the leaflet which reads: "Dishes which are not shown on the menu are available on request". That widens your choice quite considerably. If not infinitely. So I checked when they're open...


I have so many questions about those opening times, I don't know where to start. In fact I've spent so long trying to work it out, I've barely written a word of my novel today.

But still, at least China Town 2 is more welcoming that the leaflet which arrived today from the bizarrely named 'Eshna's Nutrition' in Coombe Terrace, "the only Curry & Tandoori people in the UK with your health in mind". Here's their opening gambit...


'DON'T COME AGAIN IF WE ARE NOT THE BEST'.

I've heard less threatening language from the Mafia.