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Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Here's today's obligatory kitten photo...


It's where we get the phrase 'bundle of trouble'. They have a lot in common with Lisa - she can't keep her eyes open for a photo either.

On the subject of trouble, yesterday was a day of extreme violence in the Gardner household. Amelie had her face sliced open, and I was kicked in the head. More shocking still is that Lisa was responsible for neither.

To be honest, we don't really know the full story regarding Amelie, as the other party isn't talking, and the only witnesses were blind kittens. Amelie claims that she was minding her own business and sitting quietly, contemplating her responsibilities in life, when Chloe walked up to her and scratched her on the nose.

In reality, Chloe wouldn't voluntarily go up to Am unless you dipped her in cream. And even then she'd think twice. But unfortunately, since Shimmy joined the Mothers Union and became officially off-limits to small children, Chloe's borne the brunt of Amelie's affections. For the past couple of months, Chloe's been relegated to second place in Amelie's list of preferred playmates, which is a position she's more than happy to occupy. Quite honestly, she's loved the peace and quiet. But now that Shimmy's permanently in a box under the table, Chloe's being hassled once again.

So despite Amelie's protestations of innocence, I think it's less of an unprovoked attack, and more of an act of self-defence. But either way, Amelie's now sporting a big plaster on her nose, and we've got about an hour before the nursery calls social services.

As for me, I was assaulted by my own son. I'm like Darth Vader in The Empire Strikes Back. I was lying with my head on Lisa's bump last night, when the baby kicked me in the side of the face. I think he was telling me off for paying more attention to the kittens than to my unborn child. But as I said to Lisa yesterday, if she pushes one out at the side of the sofa, I'll give her my undivided attention.

26 comments:

A Passer-by said...

"If she pushes one out at the side of the sofa..."   Are you thinking there might be two more to come?!

Phil's Mum said...

Are you sure Am didn't crawl under the table to get a closer look at the kittens and encounter a warning claw from Shimmy?

Phil said...

After the past few days, nothing would surprise me.

Big Sis said...

When I last saw Am, I did ask her to name her favourite cat (expecting the answer to be Shimmy due to the novelty factor... well, and the fact that Shimmy probably hisses a lot less than the Chlo Chlo). But she screamed out "CHLOEEE.... I love my Chloeee... ". For once, I felt sorry for that cat... she will always be No. 1 in Am's life.

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John said...

It's where we get the phrase 'bundle of trouble'. They have a lot in common with Lisa - she can't keep her eyes open for a photo either

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