Yes, I do know my comments aren't working, but no, I don't know why. And if the lack of a response from the Haloscan Support Team is anything to go by, neither do they. But anyhoo...

As part of my ongoing (and largely unsuccessful) efforts to lose weight, I've started trying to reduce portion sizes at mealtimes. And I have to say, today was my most successful day yet. All I had for lunch was one fat-free yoghurt and a cup of tea. I barely hit a hundred calories for the whole meal.

On the downside, I did stop work at 11am to eat a cheese & bacon pastry and half a Belgian bun the size of a dinner plate. Which possibly explains why I didn't want my lunch. It wasn't my fault though. I was forced to attend a fire safety seminar this morning, and my supervisor insisted on taking me to the local bakery afterwards to boost my blood sugar levels and help my brain recover from the mind-numbing tedium.

I actually had a flame-retardant lecture back in March, and this one turned out to be identical, right down to the goatee-bearded man delivering it, but apparently the NHS insist we all sit through the talk on a yearly basis, in the hope that it might eventually sink in. To be honest, I only agreed to go because it was described as a 'Refresher Course' and I thought we might get sweets.

Anyway, as surprising as it may sound, it wasn't all pointless and boring. I did learn the fascinating fact that half of all the smoke detectors in Brighton are located at the Royal Sussex County Hospital. It's no wonder they've had to ban smoking. I also enjoyed the question and answer session about evacuating the hospital in an emergency. We were told that in the event of a fire in the main tower block, we mustn't use the lifts, but should escape to safety via the stairs. Which prompted a nurse to raise her hand and ask what we do if the fire is in the stairwell.

The lecturer looked thoughtful, considered the question for a moment, and then said "I don't know". Apparently burning to death is preferable to breaking NHS rules and going down in the lift.