As it turned out, Amelie didn't manage to flog her Nanny's glassware to Fiona Bruce. We discovered that most of it came from Asda, and Lisa decided it wasn't worth queuing around the block to get a valuation on a Smart Price tumbler. So if you want to see us all on TV, you'll just have to wait for a documentary about poverty.
Lisa's gone out with her soft drinking buddies tonight, so I've been left holding the baby. She's heavy though, so I put her down early. Fully clothed. Because I couldn't get her dress off. I'm not saying I don't know my way around women's clothing, but despite unbuttoning her outfit all the way down the front, I still couldn't get her arms out, never mind pull it over her head. We spent a good ten minutes rolling around on the floor together, her laughing hysterically, me on the verge of picking up a pair of scissors. In the end I gave up, stuffed her into a gro-bag and chucked her in the cot. Lisa can sort her out in the morning.
As we speak, Lisa's at a restaurant called Harry's with a group of people from AA. So I'm watching the final of Britain's Got Talent, and making her a Key Lime Pie. Mainly because I feel guilty about eating most of her chocolate without asking. The last time she went to Harry's was on November 6th last year, and coincidentally I spent that evening cooking too. I'm even using the same dishes. Which is worrying, as the last recipe was for fish.
Anyhoo, it takes longer to cool a baked biscuit crumb base than you might think, which is why I'm sitting at the computer instead of squeezing my limes. I need to make the most of it though, because I fully intend to go the next AA event myself...
Obviously you have to question the ethics of an Alcoholics Anonymous poster which immediately names three people who are going to be there, but that aside, you've got to hand it to Brighton AA. Not only have they managed to organise some alcohol-free clubbing on a Friday night in Brighton, but they've somehow booked a DJ with four top-twenty hits under his belt. And what's more, that poster's been signed. Amelie's drawn all over it in blue biro.