My Dad, who has retired from his working life in order to spend more time sending me pointless stuff via e-mail, passed on this video to me yesterday...


That's the Mae Klong railway in Thailand. It's the only vegetable market in the world where you can get a gravy train with your potatoes, and the phrase 'five-a-day' refers to the number of commuter express trains. It makes me wonder why I get so stressed out at Asda. At least I can choose my bananas without fear of decapitation.

Anyhoo, the weekend's over, and needless to say, I haven't written my article. But I'm not blaming that entirely on my father. It's much more Lisa's fault. We might have got rid of one child for the weekend, but sadly the baby left behind has been wreaking havoc with Lisa's insides, kicking up a fuss, and causing an acid trip in her oesophagus. She's had such bad heartburn since Saturday that I've been forced to maintain an all-night vigil with a sick bucket. She only has to lie down and she throws up. Which I think is God's way of telling her to keep working.

So combining Lisa's physical shortcomings with the distraction of the Grand National means that my article remains incomplete. I did make a start, but sadly I seem to have used up a third of my word count on the introduction, and it's currently about as readable as a phone book, so I may have to start again. I was going to do so yesterday afternoon, but tragically I had to pop into town for some new bedding, and ended up at a friend's house, eating garlic bread and strudel. I think I may have procrastination issues.