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Tuesday, June 05, 2012

A friend of ours had a Jubilee Tea Party yesterday, complete with red, white and blue desserts served on union flag plates...


We didn't go, obviously. I love diamond jubilees as much as anyone, but I think I'll wait for the next one.

So we stayed in instead. Although by 3 o'clock we were climbing the walls...


That's Amelie going up in the world by trying her hand at rock climbing. The youngest person to climb Everest was thirteen, so she's got ten years to practice.

Anyhoo, we returned to Monkey Bizness yesterday afternoon, where they greeted us with a receipt every bit as confusing as the last one. After our visit ten days earlier, they'd e-mailed us a voucher entitling Amelie to free entry within a fortnight, so we just had to pay £1.25 each for me and Lisa. Clearly they reached the right conclusion, but quite how they got there is anyone's guess. As Lisa said to me last time, they must be using the same accountant as the nursery.

It being a bank holiday, the place was a lot more crowded than last time, but it also meant they'd laid on some extra activities. The main one being the rock climbing wall, which was closed the last time we were there. To my surprise, it was included in the price of admission (which in Amelie's case was nothing), and to my even bigger surprise, she was keen to have a go. Here she is at base camp, having her equipment checked by Sherpa Tenzing...


I was tensing a bit myself. To be honest, the only way I'd expect Amelie to get to the top of a mountain at the age of three-and-a-half is over the shoulder of a yeti. I had to stop filming to give her an initial bunk-up, but before I knew it, she was ten foot off the ground...


For the next hour and a half, the rest of the play equipment barely got a look in. Amelie would scale the rock climbing wall, abseil back down to earth, and then rejoin the queue for another go. She never did quite reach the top, but she reached the point where I could no longer reach her, which was slightly concerning as a parent. I don't like heights, so I was worried I'd have to send Lisa up to rescue her, and I wasn't sure they had a harness which would fit her. Pregnant mountaineers are a niche market.

Fortunately, Amelie managed to spend the afternoon driving herself up the wall without it turning into a remake of 'Touching the Void', and we eventually returned home to spend the evening watching the Diamond Jubilee Concert on BBC1. I think Cheryl must have dropped the Cole because she doesn't want to put her name to that singing, but her aside, I thought it was all very good. And the arrival of Elton John gave me the opportunity to prove something that I've been telling Lisa for the past eight years. Namely that the best version of Crocodile Rock ever performed was by Debbie Gibson in Pittsburgh in 1988. No, really.

I've told her that before, and I don't think she's ever believed me. But having watched Elton warble his way through the song like Vic Reeves doing his pub singer act, I muted Rolf Harris, and made Lisa sit through Debbie's version on YouTube.

And what's more, she agreed with me. It was an appropriate jubilee moment, because as 4,200 beacons were lit across the UK last night, I realised I'm still carrying a torch for Debbie Gibson. She was the Queen of 80s Pop, and I'll still love her sixty years later.

4 comments:

Poirot said...

'Muted Rolf Harris' what is the Gardner household playing at. There were others that probably deserved it and Elton was indeed one. Love the projectionist's work when Madness was on.
As for Amelie, glad to see she has her sights set high.

Phil's Mum said...

I agree.  I thought Rolf Harris was probably the best bit - and he's not even British!  As for Amelie, I think she has a future in the Navy;  she could be the look-out at the top of the mast.

Phil said...

Blimey, I feel I should be watching the repeat, just to see what I missed with Rolf. Although if he's as good as Grace Jones hula-hooping, I'll be surprised.

Big Sis said...

I've only just seen Am rock climbing!!! A girl after my own heart... fantastic I finally have an adventure road-trip companion. Crazy Egyptians, shark attacks and near collisions with wild bears here we come!