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Wednesday, March 13, 2013

If there's one thing people often say about us Gardners, it's that we're never happier than when we're keeping fit and exercising...


Obviously that's just the people who have never met us. Those who know us a little better will be aware that we generally like to use our cross trainer as a clothes horse for drying laundry. Or we did until we got rid of it.

Anyhoo, a family holiday wouldn't be a family holiday without Lisa throwing up, and sure enough, my wife awoke yesterday morning feeling as rough as a woman with two kids who hasn't had much sleep. After one mouthful of muesli, she requested a bucket for breakfast, and before long was turning the bedroom into a vomitorium.

At the time, she was feeling hot, cold and shivery, so we thought it was some kind of virus, but the good news is that her symptoms passed within a few hours, so I think maybe she was just sick of being woken up at night by a troublesome baby. It meant, however, that I spent yesterday morning alone with two kids and a white sofa, while Lisa was confined to her bed. So by lunchtime I needed a massage.

And fortunately, it turned out to be very good. The lady arrived with a portable massage table which she set up in the dining room for a feast of kneading and pummelling. She told me she'd been doing it for fifteen years, and it showed. She was actually very good, and the result was a lot better than my last experience. Lisa managed to take her turn too. Although she told me she almost threw up through the hole in the table.

The best thing about my massage, however, was the personal service the lady gave me as an added extra. Yes, just when I thought my rub-down was complete, she was kind enough to give me the benefit of her local knowledge by telling me about a park I should take Amelie to. She even gave me directions. And two hours later, we were there...


When I say 'we', I mean me and Amelie. And no one else. Lisa stayed at home as a precaution against vomiting, and the park was entirely deserted. We had the whole place to ourselves. Which is surprising, because it's actually fantastic.

It's called Hillworth Park, and is tucked away behind some houses in the heart of Devizes, where (clearly) nobody notices it. Or maybe they're just not mad enough to go there when the temperature's below zero. According to the park's website, it was completely revamped last year, and frankly it shows. The whole place has been kitted out with state-of-the-art play facilities and outdoor exercise equipment. They even have a brand new tennis court which is entirely free to use. It was unlocked and open, with just a simple sign politely requesting that each person only plays for an hour if there are others waiting. I've never seen anything like it. In Brighton, that sign would have been torn down and burnt.

As for the outdoor gym equipment, we were able to train...



... slide...



... and pump iron...



... without so much as a hint of vandalism. The entire place was immaculate, and everything was in perfect working order. Possibly because no one's ever used it.

They also have a small aviary, although when I told Lisa they had birds, she replied "Doesn't every park?". Ultimately though, we had the time of our lives...


Although these things always end in tears. I think I'll contact the National Accident Helpline...

4 comments:

Peter Chapman said...

Amelie needs to 'man up'.

Phil's Mum said...

Poor Am - I thought she was very brave!  And it must be something about Devizes that makes Lisa sick.  I hope she is ok today and not passed anything on to the rest of you.

Poirot said...

Dry bread and water for lunch on Saturday then Lisa?

Lisa said...

Only as a starter