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Tuesday, July 02, 2013

After two weeks on annual leave, I think my body's grown unaccustomed to work. Yesterday was my first day back, and by the end of it, I felt like I'd done a full round on an army assault course. Which is ironic, as this is how I spent my holiday...


Ah yes, the awe-inspiring sight of a finely-honed body at the peak of physical fitness, running like a well-oiled machine. Not me, obviously, but the six-year-old boy who overtakes me near the end. To be honest, I'm not so much well-oiled as fatty, and the sight of me hauling myself up that wooden slope is more likely to turn stomachs than heads.

But at least I'm willing to give it a go. And let's face it, real life commandos don't have to contend with four-year-old girls cluttering up their assault courses. So all in all, I'm putting that down as an unqualified success. With the emphasis on the unqualified. And having demonstrated our outstanding physical prowess, Amelie and I are now perfectly positioned to take over from Angelina Jolie and Jon Voight on the next Tomb Raider movie. Assuming I live that long, and the arthritis doesn't cripple me before I lose the remains of my hair.

Anyhoo, the good thing about going on holiday is that I can spin these photos out until Christmas. So here's Toby having his moment in the sun...


He should take a leaf out of Lisa's book and close his eyes for every photo. It'll stop him looking like we've just thrown acid in his face.

And on the subject of cute babies...


I expect one of them's called Gary. Of course, the obvious question to ask after reading that sign is 'What the heck is a cusimanse?'. But not if you're Amelie...


I bet David Attenborough doesn't get that kind of hassle when he's filming.

7 comments:

Zed said...

That assault course video was absolutely brilliant, I haven't laughed so much since a tortoise piddled all over Blue Witch. But why didn't you demonstrate the effect of an electric fence? You evidently were having difficulty finding words to describe it.


By the way, I've been meaning to say for ages, after you left I found a pair of socks and a t shirt (clean) in your room. Navy, as far as I remember. I'll send them on, assuming they're yours and I haven't forgotten another visitor, if you let me have your address.

Phil's Mum said...

Does Amelie not listen to a word I say? We had a conversation about electric shocks last time she was here. I thought I had it explained it quite well, but she obviously expected better from you!

Phil's Mum said...

And what IS a cusimanse? It looks a bit like a coati.

Phil said...

I'm more army than navy, as the video above proves, but I'll drop you an e-mail...

Phil said...

That reminds me, can I borrow your cattle prod?

Phil said...

It's like a cosy manse, but with rats.

Phil's Mum said...

Sounds familiar, but ours had rabbits, guinea pigs, hamsters and gerbils - don't think we ever got as far as rats!