Is it unhealthy to speak to someone on the phone for six and a half hours on a Saturday night..?

I'll take that as a yes. I could've driven to Brighton and back in that time. But hey, if the BBC are going to remove quality entertainment like 'Strictly Come Dancing' from the Saturday night schedules and replace it with football, it was bound to happen. Though I must say it was good to find out that my fellow chatter and I have achieved such a similar level of Big Brother obsession that we'd both independently set our videos before picking up the phone. To quote a line from my first play, "it just goes to show, no matter how sad you are, there's someone out there for you".

Anyhoo, despite being more excited about Royal Ascot than the European Football Championships (I find the average horse more attractive than David Beckham) (not that I'm weird or anything), I'll happily gamble on anything, particularly a bit of 'betting in running' on a live sporting event. So with 15 minutes to go in the opening match, and Greece leading Portugal 2-0, I slapped down a couple of quid on there being a third goal. Obviously I wasn't worried when we were two minutes into injury time and the score was still 2-0 - I'm a semi-professional gambler, I have nerves of steel, and I never lose. No, really.

So Portugal's goal in the 93rd minute was entirely expected and no more than I deserved. Easiest twenty-five quid I've ever made.

Not that I had a chance to rest on my laurels. I made the mistake of mentioning to Lisa that spelling is the new rock and roll, which led her to demonstrate that she's Elvis and I'm Rick Astley. So what if I can't spell accommodation and separate? Has she never heard of spellcheckers?