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Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Good news. According to today's Sun, suspected fruit-loop and serial hide & seek player, Peter Tobin, used to live in Chadborn Close, which in addition to being five minutes walk from me (or ten if you're carrying a body), is where Lisa's mother lives. I always wondered what the funny smell was. I'm tempted to ring The Sun and tell them it's not the first time dead bodies have been found there. They'll clearly print anything - today's exclusive seems to revolve around the fact that a student house in Dyke Road stinks a bit. Frankly that's not news.

But talking of the sun and printing...

Art For Art's Sake... look at that. That's art, that is. Yes, I know it looks like something a three-year-old did at nursery by drawing around a dinner plate, but it's actually a masterpiece by the late Sir Terry Frost. Who was 63 when he painted it. And probably out of nursery.

According to this article on the BBC website, Terry was "famous for his passionate use of circles", and it's not hard to see why. Just look at that passion. He's used almost three colours.

Anyhoo, Terry's flair with a pair of compasses has left me with a bit of a problem. Since Lisa broke out of Suffolk three weeks ago with a stolen masterpiece under her coat, I've been looking for a suitable frame for it, and yesterday afternoon I thought I'd found it. The charity shop around the corner had a very nice 70cm x 50cm Nielsen aluminium picture frame for £4.99. So I bought it. On the downside, the frame contained a hideous piece of toddler art, but I planned to rip that out the moment I got home, and chuck it in the recycling bin.

Unfortunately, having carried it home in a bin bag (which is where the picture would have stayed if I'd had my way), I noticed the title 'Black Sun' by Terry Frost, and the words "Screenprinted by hand in the UK by Artizan Editions", and decided that maybe I should look it up before screwing it up.

So here's what I found. It's worth £55. Plus £44 for the frame. And that's for a generic screenprint from Art Republic. Artizan Editions seem altogether more exclusive.

Obviously I'm not inclined to put something hideous on my wall just because of the label (I reserve that policy for clothes), so after a lot of soul searching, I decided that the best thing to do would be to respect the artist's work by removing the print, popping it in a postal tube, and selling it on Ebay. Leaving me with a nice frame to house my stolen art collection.

It was a plan which couldn't fail. Until it did. Having sat on the floor with a screwdriver for half an hour last night, and eventually managed to dismantle the frame (the ones I get from the Pound Shop are never this well constructed), I triumphantly removed the serigraph...

... and found that it's permanently mounted on stiff board. Not only am I unable to pop it in a postal tube, but with no separate backing board, I can't use the frame for my photos either. It's a lose-lose situation. So...

Anyone want to buy some art? Buyer collects. No timewasters please.

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