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Saturday, November 26, 2011

The trouble with young people today is that they're all getting their hair cut like Justin Bieber...

Belieber
I found out today that I'm three years older than Justin Bieber's mother. It's the kind of news that makes you feel like sinking into a wingback chair with a bag of Werther's Originals. And then slashing your wrists.

But that aside, I've been looking after Amelie this evening while Lisa goes out to meet a friend. So I barely have the strength left to write this. Naturally I wanted to do my best to entertain the girl and stimulate her mind with some creative father-daughter bonding activites, so the moment Lisa left, I cleared the dining table, laid out an array of craft materials, and set about showing her how to make her own Christmas decorations. At which point she turned to me and said "I'm bored without Mummy". I wouldn't mind, but she'd only been gone about ten minutes.

Up until that point, however, she'd had a good day. We took Amelie over to Portslade at lunchtime to visit the all-new Outshine Hair & Beauty salon. It's recently been opened by Shelly, who, after sixteen years of being stalked by Lisa across the hair salons of Brighton, has finally got her own place. It was well worth the trip too, because in addition to being good with Amelie, she gives Lisa free lattes, and doesn't laugh at my moustache. Which must be hard for a haircare professional.

From Portslade, we moved on to Shoreham, and the Holmbush shopping centre, where Amelie found herself in the same boat as Igglepiggle...

Swoosh
They both have peculiar smiles. But only one of them looks like the Nike swoosh.

She enjoyed the 50p boat ride, but it was really just her way of softening me up for the £1.50 I had to fork out for her to climb the stairway to heaven...

Steps to Success
... and spend ten minutes on top of the world...

Goofy
Just look at that big Goofy face. Still, at least her hair looks good.

Anyhoo, if there's one thing that Isaac Newton proved about giant inflatable slides, it's that what goes up, must come down...


I'm not saying she was fast, but I think my £1.50 for ten minutes worked out at a cost of 5p per slide. The irony is that Lisa spent the whole time in Marks & Spencer's. Bored without Mummy, my foot.

3 comments:

Dave said...

who is Justin Bieber?

Phil said...

I wrote about him two years ago, before he was famous:

http://www.mulledwhines.net/2009/11/its-surprising-how-close-you-can-get-to.html

So I like to think the majority of his record sales originated from this blog.

Dave said...

Famous?  How can he be famous if i've never heard of him?