Look at that. The whole picture just screams 'Congratulations on Your New Job!'. Either that or 'Deepest Sympathy on Your Loss'. But I'd like to thank Dave for being kind enough to say it with flowers by sending me the greeting on the left. As he says inside, "This was the least relevant card I could find".

Personally I like it. Although if I put it on the mantelpiece, people might think I've had a death in the family.



As for my parents, they were far less subtle...


Admittedly it looks like a wall-frieze in a children's nursery, but at least it gets the point across.

Anyhoo, today is the birthday of Lisa's mother, so Happy Birthday to her. Unfortunately technology isn't her strong point (she still calls DVDs "those round, flat things"), so the chances of her getting a computer and reading that are slim. Naturally I can't tell you how old she is, but in horse years she'd be dog food. So with that very much in mind, we took her to Hove Greyhound Stadium yesterday afternoon for a few hours of serious gambling.

Sadly the birthday girl failed to win anything all day, and Lisa turned out to be one of life's losers too, but on the bright side I came away with an impressive record of Won: £16, Lost: £11.80, Spent on Chips: £2.40, leaving me with a grand profit of £1.80. So I can treat myself to something from the pound shop, and still have enough left over for a can of Lidl cat food.