I'd just like to apologise for the slight ambiguity in yesterday's post. When I said that Lisa's sister had asked me to give her husband a lift to A & E before he collapsed and died from his injuries, I meant that he needed to get to hospital before he dropped down dead. I didn't mean that I'd done it before he died.

So I'd just like to reassure the local community that Lisa's brother-in-law is not dead, and apologise for the mass panic and hysteria which apparently swept through a certain part of Brighton last night upon reading the news of his early demise. The pen's obviously mightier than the sword (unless you read rubbish like this), and I did a far better job of killing him off than the axe-wielding maniac* who attacked him at the weekend.

Mind you, I haven't spoken to the man since yesterday, so for all I know he picked up MRSA at the hospital, and is on his way out as we speak. I'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, here's a picture of a pudding.


When I said I wanted a man-sized dessert at Christmas, that's what I had in mind.

* To be fair, we won't know if he had an axe until we get the CCTV pictures back from the chemist. And even if he did, the guy might have just been out felling Christmas trees.