Is this the CD you're looking for..?

Yes, with Amelie it was videos, and with Toby it's CD-roms. If I wasn't using such outdated technology, we wouldn't be in this situation. I should be storing it all in the cloud.

To be honest, I think it's my lack of technological innovation which is holding Toby back. We were watching 'Child Genius' on Channel 4 the other night, and it featured a mother who claimed that her son was speaking in sentences at the age of eight months. Admittedly, she didn't offer any video evidence of that, but he'd probably asked her not to film him.

Toby will be ten-and-a-half-months tomorrow, so if he's ever going to reach genius level, he really should be speaking in rhyming couplets by now, and challenging us with some decent conversation. In reality he can only say Mama, Dada and Bubba. Which is barely even a rap. The boy's bordering on stunted.

But they say that travel broadens the mind, and the good news is that as of 5pm today, I'm officially on annual leave. As Cliff Richard so eloquently put it, she's just a devil woman with evil on her mind we're all going on a summer holiday, no more working for a week or two. My fortnight's break has already got off to a rip-roaring start with a visit from Stefan and Andrew, who brightened my day and lifted my spirits by dropping round for an early evening fruit juice and the kind of good conversation I'm not getting from Toby.

So with a spring in my step and the weather turning wintry, I'm off to start packing for my summer holiday.