What was I saying on Monday about never having had a play rejected in my life..?

This morning has brought a letter from the Royal Court, informing me that "after careful consideration" (yeah right), they've decided not to offer me a multi-million pound contract to stage 'Be Worth It' after all. Their carefully considered opinion is as follows:

"We enjoyed reading the script, and found it energetically written with a neat idea. At the same time, we felt there is scope for tightening the narrative through subtext and dramatic action, as it tends to become conversational and unfocused."

A NEAT IDEA????? If I'd put that in the script, they'd have told me to avoid Americanisms. Still it's nice to know it's so energetically written. That must be why I had to eat so many bagels while I was writing it.

And may I apologise to Jen for telling her on Saturday that the good thing about writing plays is that you don't have to insert tedious action scenes just for the sake of it. Clearly you do if you want to get on at the Royal Court.

Conversational I agree with - it's supposed to be - but unfocused?? Blimey. They should've been here with me for three months surrounded by bits of paper as far as the eye can see, trying to fit that play together like a jigsaw puzzle, and making sure every scene came in right on cue, lasted an exact number of pages, and made a specific point. I would've LOVED to do a bit of unfocused rambling.

I think they must have believed Adam when he says in Act Two: "We're talking about nothing, and using it as cover for some good conversation". Of course, there's a subtext there, but you can't expect a top London theatre to pick up on that.

But obviously I appreciate constructive criticism and I'm not bitter.