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Friday, January 28, 2011

One of the things I love about Lisa is her unfailing resilience, never-say-die attitude and determination to battle on through any adversity life throws at her. It doesn't matter how many disasters she has in the kitchen, she just won't give up cooking.

Take last night for example. Within minutes of me getting home from work, Lisa decided to head into the kitchen to make some hot chocolate. Having considered her Options and reviewed her Highlights, however, she inexplicably decided to reject the instant variety and make her own from scratch. Within minutes she was attacking a bar of chocolate with a cheese grater, flinging Lindt filings all over the floor, and getting nowhere very fast.

So she turned to plan B: the food processor. Five furious minutes, two different attachments and one smell of burning from the electric motor, and she eventually managed to get the chocolate chopped. At which point she added it to a saucepan of milk and started heating.

I'd witnessed the final stage of grating after being attracted to the kitchen by the smell of industrial burning, and walking straight through a layer of chocolate debris on the floor, but I wasn't aware the heating had begun until a few minutes later when I heard a shriek from Lisa at the stove, and returned to see boiling chocolate milk all over the hob.

At the time I felt sorry for her, losing half her drink over the top of the oven, but as it turned out it didn't matter, because when she finally tasted her super-duper home-made hot chocolate creation...

... she didn't like it and had to throw the rest away.

Now, for most people, that would be enough to send them straight back to convenience foods and takeaways. But not Lisa. Ten minutes later, she announced she was going to make shortbread. Which, as a decision, just about takes the biscuit.

For Amelie and me, that was our cue to leave. And not just because the kitchen was covered in burnt milk, grated chocolate and mountains of washing up. We very kindly offered to pop to Lidl for the ingredients, and I'm glad we did too, because it turned out to be a learning experience for us both. Amelie learnt how to hold a shopping list and put things carefully into the trolley, and I learnt that she's clearly been spending too much time making cakes with her Grandma.

On our way to Lidl, I idly asked Amelie what she thought Mummy would need to make biscuits. She thought for a moment, and replied "Butter!". Which took me by surprise because I was expecting her to say "Um...". So I asked her what else, and she said "Eggs". She then looked thoughtful for a moment before adding "Flour". By the time we got to Lidl, she was telling me that we need to buy a spoon to mix the eggs, and to be careful with the oven. Clearly there's only one person in this family who knows how to cook, and it's not me or Lisa.


Z said...

Chocolate melts really well in the microwave.  It'll probably take a minute, but I'd start with 30 seconds and evaluate it then.  After all, if in doubt, it'll melt in the hot milk anyway.

Though, as Lisa didn't like it, she probably doesn't need the advice.  

Dave said...

Mmmmm... shortbread.

Anonymous said...

I think The Amster needs her own little baking set...

Phil's Mum said...

I've never made cakes with her, although she does sometimes decorate the ones I've already made.  I think she's learned it all from the 'I can cook' programme on Cbeebies.

Lisa said...

My Home Economics teacher told me not to get married or I'd be down the divorce courts. You were allowed to be completely sexist then.