Usually we just get people falling from the fourth floor around here, but not always...


That's the latest Bush satellite dish. And it's a miracle I'm here to show it to you. I've been stuck in a lift since ten to six.

Usually I'm welcomed home by an array of dodgy council estate types accusing me of everything from drilling at night to smoking on the stairs, but not today. Today I just found myself trapped between floors for twenty minutes in a small, metal, coffin-shaped box with no mobile signal. If the emergency telephone hadn't worked, I'd still be there now.

But hey, it's not every day you get to have a conversation at shouting volume with three burly firemen who are trying to prise open a lift door and drag you through a hole near the floor. I wonder if Sally Morgan saw that one coming.