As I write this, I'm chewing on a handful of Sun Dried Tibetan Goji Berries. No, really. There's no end to the number of impulse buys I'll make when I'm wandering aimlessly around Holland & Barrett on a Thursday morning. According to traditional Chinese medicine, they're believed to improve eyesight and boost sperm production. Which is odd, as I always thought people who produce a lot of sperm go blind. But aside from the medicinal benefits, they also possess the mystical quality of being ridiculously expensive. And strangely moreish. I could be broke within the week.
And talking of money, I learnt a valuable financial lesson this week. If you know you're not going to see your Mum until the beginning of April, don't buy her a Mother's Day present the week before Mother's Day. The thoughtful gift which has been sitting on a shelf in my bedroom for more than a week waiting to be presented to my Mum, is currently being sold at 60% off in the post-Mother's-Day clearance sale at the shop where I bought it. I could have saved myself a fortune. That's if 60% of something cheap can be considered a fortune.
But anyhoo, when I'm not buying overpriced berries and regretting my own generosity, I'm busy hanging out at the jobcentre. I dropped in there this morning to see all my old friends and give them a good laugh at my latest jobseeking efforts. Interestingly though, I was accosted outside by a small group of people who handed me a bright orange leaflet asking if I'm "fed up with being bullied and kicked around by the employment service and their privatised gestapo, Working Links". Apparently, (and this is a fact - leaflets never lie), "their staff earn generous bonuses using bullying and intimidation, making claimants suicidal and depressed so they go off sick".
Fortunately I was already sick and depressed before I signed on, so they can't touch me, but there's a 'Fight Back Meeting' on the first Tuesday of every month for anyone interested in "action, not words". Although let's face it: their target audience are people who are both depressed and unemployed, so I can't see many turning up.