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Monday, January 24, 2005

I've just had a close encounter with Chris Eubank! Well, Chris Eubank's armoured assault vehicle. And I thought it was exciting meeting Mike Read and Lord Brockett on the beach last summer.

At the bottom of the hill where Lisa lives is the private school attended by the Eubank herd. I pass it every day, but so far have failed to spot Chris doing the school run or attending PTA meetings. This morning however, on my return from driving Lisa to work, I swung around the corner and nearly hit a huge Hummer parked illegally on the double yellow lines opposite the school.

Now I'm not saying it was definitely Chris Eubank's vehicle, but the registration number was '1 KO'.

I was tempted to call for a traffic warden, or possibly just clean his windscreen, charge him a fiver and ask where he gets his jodhpurs, but I hadn't had any breakfast, so in the end I just drove past and went home for my Honey Nut Cheerios. It was quite exciting at the time though, and puts me one up on Lisa, who's only met Biggins and Blair (Lionel, not Tony).

Anyhoo, today is apparently the most depressing day of the year. Hurrah! Personally though I'm keeping my spirits up thanks to a valuable new revenue stream which has boosted my bank balance over the weekend. It involves sitting on Lisa's sofa and waiting for her to bet me a pound on a Big Brother related issue.

It began on Friday when, in a moment of inspiration, Lisa bet me a pound that Bez would be voted out of the house. I went for Caprice, and the result was the quickest pound Lisa's ever lost. Having learnt her lesson (obviously), she proposed another bet last night - that Bez would finish third. I said Brigitte, the deal was struck, and I was another pound up.

At which point my conscience got the better of me. Feeling guilty about taking another pound off my dearly beloved, and knowing that Kenzie was the nailed-on winner, I magnanimously bet Lisa a pound that Bez would win, just so she could have her money back.