I'm a bit frustrated at the moment. The city is currently playing host to the Brighton Hip-Hop Festival 2007, which is apparently "the UK's largest celebration of Hip Hop Culture", and "recognised as a must attend event for all Hip Hop enthusiasts across the globe". Now, don't let my love of Take That fool you - in reality I'm totally street, down with the kids, and very much from the ghetto, so with that in mind I'm naturally keen to get involved. It sounds quite jolly.

Unfortunately I'm struggling to find any events that will have me. All this week the BHHF are holding free workshops with AudioActive2 at Brighton Youth Centre, which is only five minutes walk from my flat. Last night there was the chance to learn beatboxing (which I think is some kind of martial art) with a tutor called BadFunk, while later in the week they're holding breakdancing classes with a chap called Ill Boogz. He doesn't sound at all well.

By this time next week I could be a beatboxing, breakdancing hip-hop dynamo, but oh no, because as it turns out, classes are only open to 13-19 year olds. I'm fifteen years too late. Personally I think it's an outrage. Why am I not allowed to learn gangsta rap with the rest of the phat people?

All is not lost though. I am permitted to go and look at "an enormous wooden box" which has been "erected outside the Brighton Central Library and will be painted by some of Brighton's and the UK's most exciting graffiti, stencil and street artists". I used to like stencilling when I was little.

Even more intriguing than that, however, is this:

"The Art Of Hip Hop – DarkDaze Collectable Edition Prints.

DarkDaze is one of the scene's most accomplished and dedicated photographers.

We are proud to announce that DarkDaze is creating a series of collectable prints especially for BHHF 07. During the festival watch out for these exclusive prints, grab them while you can, swap them with your mates, try to find the whole set, but above all, get to know the work of DarkDaze. The prints are free to whoever finds them!"

The first clue has been posted on the BHHF blog, and it's this:

"The central Brighton location of Print #1 is an anagram of:

DIRE RANK

Once you've solved this incredibly difficult puzzle get down there, ask nicely and you will be rewarded."

Right, that's it, I'm off to the Ear Drink.