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Sunday, June 12, 2011

The stormy skies, the streaming tears, the desperate imploration to a merciful god in the heavens above - yes, it can mean only one thing...

Happy Days
It's another Gardner Family Fun Day!!!

It's more than a year now since we had the time of our lives in Worthing, and having made various attempts at fun in the intervening months (with mostly limited success) we decided it was about time we got back out there into the fun fray yesterday afternoon by spending a happy hour or two at Drusillas.

Yes, Drusillas Zoo Park in Alfriston, winner of the Tourism South East 'Visitor Attraction of the Year' Award for 2010/11, and one of the best family days out in the country. Here we are outside the dog enclosure...

Banana Split
I'm still not sure about that yellow shirt. I bought it in a charity shop last week, and I'm inclined to think I look a bit like a fat banana. When I put it on yesterday morning, I asked Amelie if I looked nice in yellow, and she said "No. You need blue". It's like living with Gok Wan.

Anyhoo, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "Phil, I've been to Drusillas, and I don't remember the dog enclosure. Is it new?". Well it's funny you should ask. And a relief that Amelie didn't. Because as it happens, that's not Drusillas. We looked up their website before we left, and found that tickets for the zoo cost £15.70 per adult. And an adult is anyone aged two or above. It's as if the prices were set by Amelie. She's been convinced she's an adult for the past six months.

Obviously I'm more than happy to pay forty-five quid for an afternoon out. But I'm happier still to pay nothing. So after a quick search on the web, we ended up here...


That's the Raystede Centre for Animal Welfare. It's a pet rescue place in Ringmer, and - here's the key part - entry is free. As long as your toddler doesn't twig that everything on display is available to take home, it's the perfect family day out.

In fact it was even more perfect than we expected. I was anticipating an old fashioned dogs' home. What we found was an idyllic country park, complete with lakes, trees and fields, filled with state of the art animal enclosures, and every creature you could think of. Apart from elephants. And crocodiles. But those two disappointments aside, it was everything Amelie wanted.

Here she is with a homeless old goat...


And here I am still worrying about my shirt...


I might put that on Twitter and pretend to be Wayne Rooney.

Unfortunately, it wouldn't be a Gardner Family Fun Day without a bit of torrential rain, and sure enough, within twenty minutes of arrival, the monsoon started. So with the recent drought news still ringing in our ears, we sought some shelter at the Shelter, and headed indoors to the small animal department. Which is where I made the timely discovery that they have chinchillas available for adoption. I'll be mentioning that to my boss on Monday morning.

Having felt ratty, and seen a few gerbils, we then experienced the centre's other main indoor attraction: the café. They sell toffee cake to die for (from heart disease and obesity), as well as serving tea in fantastic all-in-one teapots...


Mr Tea would pity the fool who didn't realise that the cup was underneath the teapot, and as luck would have it, Lisa managed to stop me just as I was getting up to complain about the lack of a cup with my cuppa. I'm not really used to high quality homewares. The only china I have is 'made in', and I'm more at home with polystyrene.

It was in the café that Amelie disovered her driving ambition to have a go on the white van ride, a thrill-seeking machine which moves approximately six inches forwards and backwards whilst making an unrealistic vrooming noise for all of thirty seconds. It cost 50p a time. And she loved it more than any of the centre's other attractions. In fact, if you gave her the choice of a family day at Drusillas, or ninety goes in the van, she'd choose the café ride every time.

We eventually left the machine two pounds lighter, and spent another 50p on a bag of corn for the birds, before heading back outside, where the monsoon had eased to a light downpour. Amelie soon located a creature which looked like a cross between an ostrich and a duck, and the feeding commenced...

Big Bird
Sadly I failed to capture the moment when she grew bored with scattering corn, and decided to feed the thing by hand, but fortunately she's spent most of today talking about the moment she got bitten by a big chicken, so I don't think it's something we'll forget.

One of Raystede's best features is its beautiful walks around picturesque lakes, populated by vast flocks of wildfowl and geese. If you like that sort of thing. Personally I did. And so did Amelie. But Lisa felt it was a bit like our stroll around Cozumel, only with hissing birds instead of lizards. I managed to lead her past the odd aggressive goose, but by the time she'd had a gander at the path ahead...

Honk!
... she insisted on turning back. So with the rain getting steadily worse, and the wind more biting than the birds, we sprinted back towards the cattery...


And ended up in the rabbitry...

Bunny Girls
As the bunny girl in the front kept saying, "I think we're a little bit lost now".

Having wondered aloud why the rabbits didn't have their umbrellas up, we then took a group vote on who needed to stay dry the most, and headed off to the kennels...

Gone to the Dogs
We might have been dogged by bad luck when it came to the weather, but our afternoon at Raystede was actually a roaring success. If it wasn't for the cake, the tea, the corn and the van rides, I'd have got away without spending a penny. Apart from my frequent trips to the toilet. The centre's patron is Penelope Keith, who apparently adopted a cat there, and she's an appropriate supporter to have. Our visit was like an episode of The Good Life: everything was free, we made our own entertainment, and we ended up covered in mud.

10 comments:

Phil's Mum said...

Did they have any aardvarks?

A Passer-by said...

Part of the Raystede website says this:
<span>
<p>"The small animal section at Raystede is responsible for the care and re-homing of approximately 130 animals.
We do not rehome any animals from this section to households where there are children under 7 years old."
</p><p>That should be reported to the RSPCA - Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Amelie.
</p></span>

Dave said...

I don't think I'm ever going to eat any toffee cake now. Or else I will die - or at least have my legs cut off - apparently.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant post, Phil.  Since you managed the walk round, I hope your foot is better.  And tell Lisa that she looks very pretty and slinky-hipped in those photos.  As do you of course.  

Z said...

Oh, that was me, by the way.  

Lisa said...

You're such a sweetheart, Z

Phil said...

I think they'd all been adopted.

Phil said...

It's an odd rule. Surely the only people interested in hamsters are the under sevens? By the time Amelie hits eight, I confidently expect her to want a pitbull.

Phil said...

It's funny because it's true.

Phil said...

Thanks, Z. Although I think the slinky hipped compliments would have played better if I hadn't posted pictures of cake.

As for the foot, don't go there...