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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

I was just tucking into my Sainsbury's 'Be Good to Yourself' Cumberland Pie yesterday lunchtime whilst reading about Michelle McManus in Heat magazine (a little insight into my daily life there), when Lorraine's parents turned up with a window box and asked if they could come in to fill up their watering can. It turned out to be an excuse to stand in the kitchen for fifteen minutes and grill me about mine and Lisa's wedding plans. Apparently we're a good match, seem to get on very well (appearances can be deceptive), and should be down that aisle the moment Mrs B has bought a hat.

Personally I just kept smiling and nodding, then complimented them on their hanging baskets, and started thinking about Michelle McManus. Lisa has dreams about her ill-fitting jumpers, y'know. Which is quite embarrassing, but not as embarrassing as deciding to buy Heat magazine whilst in the queue at Sainsburys, purely because she's on the cover claiming to have lost five and a half stone. A claim I refute, incidentally, having forked out £1.50 of my hard-earned cash and examined the evidence for myself. I still think she should go on tour with Rik Waller, and release a cover of Renee & Renata's 'Save Your Love', but will she listen to me?

No, she won't.

Anyhoo, the more interesting news of the day is that having spent the past two months saying that five scripts will make the shortlist for each sitcom in their Last Laugh competition, the BBC have now said it'll only be four. So on the one hand it means (calculator out) that I now have to be amongst the top 0.8% of entries to make the shortlist for Annie's People, but on the other it means they've clearly had so many rubbish entries that they're struggling to find as many as five decent ones.

Which has to be good news. Unless mine was the fifth best script.

Unfortunately they also say this:

"These short-lists will start coming back to us in the next few weeks and we'll begin to call people to let them know. If you do get a phone call remember not to tell everyone about it - we want to keep the names of the people on the short-list secret until the series goes out in September / October."

Is it just me, or is that slightly barking? You're supposed to be able to win a big writing contest, film a TV series, meet a load of famous people, and somehow manage not to mention it to anyone.

But on the bright side, it means that if in a few weeks time I don't mention that I've won this competition, you can all assume that I have.