But then again, Pete Waterman's judging the vegetables at this year's Shotley Summer Fete.
No really, he is.
Well ok, he's not. But I bet we could get Dr Fox if we wanted to.
Anyhoo, I'd just like to offer my congratulations to my friend Paula, who has just learnt that she's to become a grandmother for the first time. Being barely out of my twenties, I'm clearly too young to have grandmothers as mates, so we may have to call time on this friendship, but it was good while it lasted. And it just goes to show that I can comfortably get on with old people. Lisa being a case in point.
So to celebrate, here's a picture of Paula with her legs apart.

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