Before leaving for Brighton yesterday afternoon, I got an e-mail from the BBC confirming that they've received my Last Laugh entry. Which is a bit of a shame. It means that when I lose I can't adopt my usual tactics of claiming they never received it.

So there's no alternative - I'll just have to bribe the judges. And fortunately I may soon have the financial means to do it...

Four months ago, in the midst of a hogmanay fog, I invested £15 in a horse called Rob Roy to win the 2,000 Guineas at Newmarket at the end of April. At the time he was a ickle baby horse who'd only run one race in his entire life. But that was four months ago. He's now run... um... two. And he didn't win the second one.

But personally I still think he's got winner written all over him. Or he would do if the police hadn't confiscated my spray can. And anyway, having backed him at 20-1 four months ago, he's now the 5-1 second favourite for today's race, so frankly I've already had a moral victory here.

Though to be honest I'd prefer the three hundred pounds. So if you've got fingers, cross them. And then stick two of them up at the TV when the Iceman cometh and pips him on the line.