Honestly, I wish the powers that be would make their minds up. First they tell us all to conserve the world's natural resources and do our best to save water. Then they criticise Michael Jackson for sharing his shower with an eight year old. They can't have it both ways.

Mind you, at least it explains his back injury a couple of weeks ago. He claimed he slipped in the shower, which is not surprising - it's obviously quite crowded in there, and one of the boys probably dropped the soap.

But anyhoo, I returned home from Brighton last night, so having spent only four days apart in the last month, Lisa and I now have to go nine days without seeing each other. You can hear the cheering on the south coast from here. And that's just Lisa's mother.

I've come home to exciting news from Kingster, who informs me via e-mail that Google are about to launch Video Blogging, and that in future people such as ourselves will be known as Vloggers. Which makes us sound like aliens from the new series of Dr Who.

As Paul himself says, "does this mean a market is opening up for Vlog body doubles?", and he's got a point. Obviously I'm gorgeous, and have no problem with appearing in public on the world wide web, but for people like Lisa, who believe the camera is an invention of pure evil designed to make us all look fatter, it could be tempting to employ a willing stand-in, desperate to get in front of the lens on her behalf.

At the very least it could be a way back into showbiz for Michael Barrymore.