I seem to be constantly two days behind with my blog posts here. Which is what happens when your decision to drive 800 miles in four days coincides with the start of Big Brother.

But anyhoo, Sunday. Well Sunday was mine and Lisa's first anniversary, so we went out for a meal with my family to celebrate... my sister's birthday. Which was on May 12th. And I thought I was behind with my blog posts. Big Sis is currently over from America for some reason or other, and was sporting a large bruise on her foot after falling up the step of her cottage in Weymouth. She only visits the place about once a year, but she's already ended up on crutches after falling down the step, and in casualty after being concussed by a vacuum cleaner. She hasn't been kicked by a donkey for a few years now though.

Anyhoo, Lisa and I were due to be at the restaurant 8 miles away at 6:30pm. Which is why I was still posting on my blog at 6:08pm. We would have been there sooner though if my Mum hadn't insisted on texting me en route to ask where we were.

Having successfully bonded with Lisa's nephew over the past year, Lisa proved equally popular with my niece, meaning she had the pleasure of spending the evening with a six year old on her knee, being followed to the toilets, and forced to share her lipstick and hairbrush every five minutes.

The meal over, we returned to my parents for cake (with my niece surgically attached to Lisa in the back of my car), and watched my brother's Disneyworld holiday video, which featured a Winnie the Pooh ride ("quite scary" apparently), a chat with a mermaid, and a highly convincing meerkat impression from Big Sis.

Yesterday Lisa and I dropped in on my parents again. We'd announced our intention to leave my flat at 3pm, which is why yesterday's blog was posted at 3:31pm. But they know what we're like by now. Once there, my niece presented Lisa with a picture of the two of us, and tried to pin us down to another visit. Lisa's always said that if we ever break up, the person who'll be most upset is her nephew. Not any more. If my niece never saw Lisa again, I don't think she'd ever get over it.

Anyhoo, we stayed long enough for a quick bounce on the bed, and a few cocktail sausages, then it was back down to Brighton, via a major rain storm and another accident on the A12, meaning I got to show Lisa the delights of Maldon and South Woodham Ferrers. I think Essex is growing on her.

I'm off now to Asda at Brighton Marina. I bought the super soaraway Sun today for their cut-out-and-keep guide to the GI Diet (which is nothing to do with American soldiers) (I don't think), so I need to go and buy some porridge. I'll look like Anthony Worrall Thompson in no time.